From conception to birth and beyond, motherhood brings about many emotions. (Seriously, do your hormones ever go back to “normal?”) There’s even a discovery of new emotions! (Who knew?!?!?!?!) And one of the biggest, fiercest and often most prevalent…drumroll please – da da dahhhh….MOM GUILT! Let’s chat!
It all started with newborn life. You know sleep, eat, sleep, eat, sleep, eat. There was a nice, little dance. It was HARD and parental sleep was NON-EXISTENT. All the days ran together, but time FLEW by in hindsight. There was a rhythm.
Then, infant life showed its glorious face providing longer, more active awake hours. But those hours were easily filled with food and play. The nice, calm play that includes learning to roll over, crawl, pull themselves up, etc. And although there are fewer sleep periods, this new activity leads to longer stretches of sleep. Again, it’s an amazing little mom-kid dance.
But then…
…the number of naps dwindle. The need for significant stimulation and energy depletion becomes LIFE for a toddler. The awake hours become legit HOURSSSS. So, now what?! What the heck do we do ALL day?
Trying to keep a toddler scheduled, entertained and engaged all day to his standards might be the most difficult task I have ever had. And now that he has realized he has an opinion, which he can communicate via tantrums, and the word “no,” I often find myself silently praying, “Jesus take the wheel.”
I really thought we were going to make it to the age of two without television. (You know, when I was pregnant and the perfect mom.) Then one day, I discovered the magic that is Paw Patrol and Dave & Ava. They provide the quietest and fastest 20 minutes of the day. Magic in it’s own right – but that, truthfully, brings about more guilt.
It’s so hard to gauge how much, how hard and how realistic it is to “push” a toddler. Is that even possible? Let’s be real, he’ll just get up and walk away if he doesn’t want to read a book or count or really do anything! And, I get that.
Toddlers are great helpers. The chores may take longer, but they are so engaged and excited about the activity of what’s going on around them. But ya’ll, I can be lazy at times. I don’t want to do chores all day, EVERY single day!
And, don’t get me wrong; playing with him is fun. I love how excited he gets when he learns new things or when I sing his favorite songs. It really is one of the coolest experiences as a parent…to see pure joy through the eyes of your child. However, I’m not sure how many more twists I can put on “The Wheels on the Bus” and “Ring Around the Rosy.” I’m low-key tired of my own voice.
“They” say boredom isn’t the worst thing in the world and that it may even be a good thing. “They” say it promotes a healthy imagination. I just wish it also eliminated the guilt.
Do you/have you dealt with this kind of mommy guilt? Is this more prevalent among first time moms? How do you entertain your kids? Let me know in the comments down below!
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It’s true. Being a mommy is an exciting time but it can also be exhausting. Enjoy every moment while you can. These little people we are moulding will soon become who they are meant to be. Take the best care and be confident that one day you will reap the benefits.
Oh, the mom guilt. It’s no joke! I just had my second and I’m still feeling the mom guilt so I don’t know if it ever goes away. But on the bright side, that guilt just means that you care, so it’s kind of a good thing 🙂
I am a first-time mom with a 3-month-old, and he does not take naps… What is wrong with this child? Haha! I have to fight the guilt too. My guilt is more along the lines of not wanting to be a mom that has regrets of not spending enough time with my baby. But, I’ve realized I won’t get anything done if I give into that. So now I just let him cry it out every once in awhile. It’s good because I don’t think it’s good to cater to their every want. We can’t neglect them but we also can’t let our worlds revolve around them. It’s a balance, I guess! Thanks for opening up and sharing!
I think this kind of mom guilt is prevalent for mom’s with every kid they have. It’s hard to get around it, but I really think it is a matter of self care foe all of us. We have to remember we can’t give from an empty cup!
I understand the mom guilt, felt like everything I did was wrong because I was so young, and wasn’t even sure how to take care of another human, was he fine, was he bored, should I do this or that…well that child is now 20 and just fine, I also had 3 other kids, my youngest is 4, there is no guilt that I let her lay in my bed watching youtube on her tablet while I lay down a bit longer in the morning..you’re doing fine, momma.
i feel u here. being a mom means singing the same songs 1000 times and playing the same things 10000 times. i have 2 kdis and sometimes the list seems endless “
Haha I had the same view on no TV too – but really it does no harm for a little break for both of you. I have my second on the way in April – you have just reminded me of the little sleep – ahhh! x